Advertising Tutorial

How to Get Your Copywriter to Never Ever Write Anything for You Again, Ever
An easy guide for Account Executives - try it today!

Step 1!
Talk out of your ass.
Criticize the work before you've even seen it. Tell everyone in earshot that the client will hate it, although you don't even know what color it is or what the words are. Those are technicalities.

Step 2!
Develop amnesia.
Conveniently forget that the client is a big fan of the writer and quite possibly likes her better than you.

Step 3!
Be a dick.
Talk shit about the writer to the person in the office across the hall from hers. Use your big boy outside voice.

Step 4!
Push your luck.
When the writer comes over to defend herself, go into chode mode. Talk over her, claim she doesn't know what she's talking about, condescend to her by telling the everyone in the room to "just nod like you agree." Crap on the work one more time and then yell at anyone who says they like it.

Step 5!
Be afraid.
The writer is not above rubbing a dirty toilet brush all over everything in your office while you are away at a client meeting. This is probably the least disgusting thing she did in your office today, FYI.

Also, don't be surprised if everyone at work now thinks you're a hermaphrodite.

Song for People on Maniacal Power Trips
"Bukowski" - Modest Mouse

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Glazed Anatomy
Two girls. A bottle of wine. A pottery shop with a TV tuned to Channel 7. Looks like we have a new favorite thing to do on Thursday nights.