My Humps

This morning I was wandering around the house bare-ass nekkid, as you do, wondering if it was skirt weather and how unreasonable it would it be to warm up some of yesterday's coffee in the micro when suddenly my landlord knocks at the door and yells "Hey KAR!" then OH GOD HE'S UNLOCKING THE DOOR AND HE'S COMING IN QUICK QUICK TO THE BATHROOM! FIND ROBE! COVER ASS! And then I came out of the bathroom clutching my robe around me and I was like DUDE WTF? And there was an 80 year old plumber with him and he was all I FIX ZEE PIPES! and the landlord was like "uhhhh, but your car wasn't here! And I called your cellphone!" And I was like, yah, car's in the shop and cell phone's charging, nice work bucky. Then I remembered that he hasn't raised my rent in a couple of years or started charging me for heat or anything and besides, he's pretty good looking so I just said THAT'S OKAY and went to put some clothes on.

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One of my friends at work just got laid off. Without getting into the details, let it be said that she got the shaft and I am terrifically pissed on her behalf. The alcohol ban will be temporarily suspended when we go for a glass of wine after work tonight.

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I am totally rocking the side ponytail today.



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Please buy me this sofa.