Hi, My Name Is...

Whenever a potential client comes into The Jeeb, ill-conceived attempts at brown-nosing inevitably ensue. Today it's the pancake people and name tags. Instead of throwing mine straight into the trash like it deserves, I decided to get into the spirit of things and pin it on. After a few slight customizations, of course.

The CEO actually gave this his blessing. Sucka!

The Cost of Puppy Sitting:
One extremely cute pair of red undies.


One Word Oscar Summaries
Because brevity is the soul of wit, and also excellent when you're lazy.

Chris Rock: heh
Sean Penn: ass
The Aviator: shuddup
Antonio Banderas: shampoo
Antonio Banderas: shuddup
Beyonce: again?
Beyonce: SHUDDUP
Cate Blanchett: adorable
Kirsten Dunst: wig
Jake Gyllenhaal: yummers
Penelope Cruz: assbow
Kate Winslet: tittilating
Natalie Portman: yowza
Charlize Theron: scary
Morgan Freeman: love
Charlie Kaufman: LOVE
Josh Groban: die
The Nard: die
Prince: unimpressed
P. Diddy: confused
Johnny Depp: shave
Hillary Swank: yawn
Jamie Foxx: rerun
Clint Eastwood: eh
Million Dollar Baby: whatever