The Tiny Little Man Song

Much Less Dirty Than It Sounds

Scene: Last night. 9:45 p.m. My telephone rings.

Tequila Red: Hello?
Sugar: Helloooo!
Tequila Red: Jenna?
Sugar: Hi! I started drinking at 9 AM!
Tequila Red: Oh lord. Where are you?
Sugar: Ish okay. I juss walked into my builDInG!
Tequila Red: Good.
Sugar: Hey. Listen. I juss got fired. HA HA HA HA HA!
Tequila Red: From Mickey's?
Sugar: I was a little late. Also, maybe a little drunk. [MUMBLE MUMBLE] ...kep givin' me Mind Erasers! I kep saying to stop, but....
Tequila Red: Well, I hope you at least made some money off 'em first.
Sugar: Yep! $11! HA HA HA HA HA. (Hiccup!) And then my manager tried to grab my breasteseses. I should totally sue them. Don't you think I should sue them? I said, "I should totally sue yer asses!"
Tequila Red: He was grabbing at your girls? Jerk.
Sugar: He's a tiny little man!
Tequila Red: Ha.
Sugar: Really! Tiny! Teeeeny tiny!
Tequila Red: Hee hee.
Sugar: Tineeeey litttttlee maaaaan. It's a song! Let's sing it!
Tequila Red: Maybe you should go to bed.
Sugar: Oh. Okay. You think?
Tequila Red: Yep. Drink some water first.
Sugar: Okay. Yeah, that's what I'll do. Bed, water. Hey, tellwendiisaidheyandigotfiredandigotadrinkingtickettoday. Butitwasfunanywaybye.
Tequila Red: All right, I'll see-
*click*
Tequila Red: I sure hope she's not running a bath right now.
Wendi: Does it even really matter?